7/1/08 | Smoked Oysters
[ Currently Eating: Leftover Enchiladas ]

Heading into the long weekend, I’m going to feed your need for Gross Eats on Cheap Eats. I sincerely hope this doesn’t spoil your appetites for the upcoming BBQ I know you’ll be pigging out at. If you have an aversion to closeups of seafood, please turn away now.
I have to admit I was in a bit of an Andrew Zimmern mood as I waltzed down the aisles at Big Lots the other day. I’d avoided Ocean Prince Smoked Oysters even though I’ve seen them as cheap as 75 cents on occasion. These were marked up to a buck fifteen, but I figured it was high time I faced them down like a man. (Or woman, for those of you who keep thinking I’m a girl.)
Now, I’ve had oysters from cans before and they never look very pretty. In fact, they look downright nasty or even scary. But they’ve tasted pretty good and I usually fry ‘em up anyhow so they don’t look as bad. But I’ve never had smoked oysters before and I’ve always wondered how they differed in taste.
I took the liberty of cutting off the post here, so if you don’t wish to look at gross oyster pictures you can go ahead start the July 4 weekend. But for those with stomachs of steel, read on…

OMG. Look at those things. As I pulled the top off of the tin, even your usually stalwart Editor was a bit grossed out.
I was trying to decide if these look more like opposum kidneys, air-inflated cockroach carcasses or iguana ovaries. Hm… it’s a tossup but I think I go with the kidneys. I think the reddish hue that the oysters pick up from the smoking process actually adds to the gross-out factor. I much prefer gazing at the oysters when they’re grey in color. These looked a little too… LIVELY for my taste.
There were 11-13 smoked oysters in the can. I didn’t really count them because I was too busy spreading these out nicely on a pretty plate.

You might be thinking at this point that I gave up the ghost and resigned myself to changing the review to another Big Lots food purchase like Brooks Chili. Nope, I actually ate every single one of these bad boys right off the plate.
They were actually quite good if you didn’t look at them. I closed my eyes and savored the smoked squish of these creatures from the deep. I was thinking that these might be go better with lots and lots of cold cheap beer - maybe I’ll try that next time.
The oysters tasted a bit on the dry side even though they were packed in oil. I think maybe the smoking process does something to the texture. Otherwise they were pretty similar to normal oysters from a can. Would I buy these again? Probably not, unless it was Halloween and I wanted to scare away the little kids who keep thinking I’m some sort of Cheap Eats Ogre. Hey, 2 year old candy tastes just as good if you’re only in it for the sugar…
Price:$1.15 for 3 oz tin
Found At:Big Lots
Cheap Eats Score: 5/10






July 1st, 2008 at 11:04 am
Wow. Talk about taking one for the team, Chef Boyardee and now this….my admiration is boundless!
July 1st, 2008 at 11:44 am
I’d rather eat these than sardines, but thats not saying much.
July 1st, 2008 at 7:26 pm
i like smoked oysters and sardines. both are good with saltines. not too sure about canned ravioli tho.
July 2nd, 2008 at 12:11 am
A friend of mine keeps telling me that canned oysters are super delicious, but I still haven’t tried them. I might pick up some regular ones sometime, but these just seem too out there for me. Not much of a sea food person.
July 2nd, 2008 at 10:22 am
I like smoked oysters. You should try one on a cracker with tabasco sauce, a squirt of lime and some salt. Yum. Smoked baby clams are even better this way. Beer IS a nice addition, but not mandatory.
July 2nd, 2008 at 11:41 pm
You are a brave, brave man!
July 3rd, 2008 at 10:26 am
Hmm, i might have to try them again, picked them up at the $1 store for my family, since some love them… unfortunately i have a aversion to cold seafood that i havn’t gotten over since getting sick eating nearly a whole wheel of shrimp from Red Lobster one newyears when I was like 8 years old.
July 4th, 2008 at 6:24 am
I LOVE smoked oysters- sort of soul food to me since my dad used to eat them and he’d sare the can with me. Of course, he also ate pickled pig’s feet, and no way was I going there, so I’m not sure why the oysters looked OK to me!?
July 5th, 2008 at 12:09 am
I don’t know if this is really true. They say oysters are aphrodisiacs? Coz’ when I eat this kind of foods It seems normal. Any experience that you can share?
July 6th, 2008 at 6:04 pm
smoked oysters are just awesome
Grab some sharp cheddar and cube it. Take a cube and put it on a toothpick, add a small pickled pearl onion and then stab and oyster and pop it into your mouth. totally delicious.
Seriously though, there’s something off with that colour. All the smoked oysters I’ve ever eaten are all dark grey with the edges black.
July 7th, 2008 at 9:35 am
I love the ones at Whole Foods but they are a bit pricey. Think I will make a trip to Big Lots this afternoon.
July 8th, 2008 at 5:55 pm
I love them. I even had that brand before. During thanksgiving I used the smoked oysters for dressing.
August 5th, 2008 at 10:10 pm
smoke oysters chopped up and mixed with garlic powder, pepper and
chopped up green onions then mixed in with a half/half mix of sour cream and cream cheese makes a great party dip. (I also put hot sauce in mine. yum)
August 5th, 2008 at 11:12 pm
I like any brand of smoked oysters in a can once or twice a year. They’re good out of the can or drained of the oil and then further dried using paper towels.. Try adding them to packaged Raman,Somam or udon noodles with slice scallions and mayby some of those canned baby shrimp from thailand or whatever. I’ve done it and besides being cheap it’s better than some food I’ve had in Oriental food places. Love your website and keep the articles comming. Best to you, Mike
August 19th, 2008 at 10:54 pm
My ex husband used to eat these all the time. I like oysters. If they’re ordered in a restaurant and eaten either raw or fried. These, however, smell like hell and I don’t think I could even put one in my mouth. Of course, I also have bad associations with them. You are a brave man.
October 7th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
I think these are great, however sometimes I feel bad for my co-workers when I have some of these with saltine crackers for lunch. I like the idea of chopping them up and making a dip as a previous commenter suggested. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…
February 6th, 2009 at 9:40 am
I love smoked oysters unfortunatly I can’t find a brand of tinned oysters that aren’t raised in the sewers of China
March 14th, 2009 at 9:04 pm
Nothing like smoked oysters on whole wheat crackers with five or six drops of Mr. Goudas’ Hot Pepper Sauce. Plus a nice frosted mug out of the freezer filled with cold dark ale. Mmmmmmm!!!!!
March 23rd, 2009 at 2:10 pm
Do smoked oysters from a can contain the same zinc benefits as raw oysters??
I would really like to know this if anyone outthere would be so kind.
Thanks,
Dave
March 31st, 2009 at 9:13 pm
Yes, they more or less contain the same level of minerals, including zinc, as when they are raw. The way they are prepared does not lower mineral content to any appreciable extent.
If you are concerned that the level might be just a bit lower, you could more then compensate by eating just one extra smoked oyster
June 25th, 2009 at 10:48 pm
Good god, who could feel distaste for some smoked oysters out of a can? What are you, three years old?
July 4th, 2009 at 9:10 pm
Smoked oysters are wonderful! I recommend them on thin slices of dark rye with dijon or hot English mustard with Gruyere cheese and a splash of hot sauce!
Someone above inquired about oysters as an aphrodisiac, they are not naturally an aphrodisiac, however they are a superb source of zinc, a deficiency of which can cause lowered libidos. They were thought to be an aphrodisiac mainly because of their appearance which is supposedly similar to the clitoris.
September 22nd, 2009 at 10:09 am
Smoked canned oysters are a wonderful treat. I’ve been eating them for 50 years. They are very, very good. Different brands result in different sizes, color and taste due to the various marinating liquids. What they say about them, being an aphrodisiac, isn’t totally true. I ate a couple dozen once and only 4 of them worked.
November 7th, 2009 at 7:55 pm
I love canned sardines and wanted to love canned smoked oysters, but all the brands I tried were packed in cottonseed oil and had a really “mushy” texture. Just found Crown Prince brand smoked oysters today, packed in olive oil, and they are great! Little hot sauce, salty cracker- yum!