4/7/09 | VanCamp’s Pork&Beans
[ Currently Eating: Leftover Spaghetti ]
After my earlier Defcon-ish review of Beanee Weenee, I was a little hesitant to dive back into the murky waters of Van Camp’s cheap but questionable offerings. I mean, I’ve got about 55 cans of Rosarita refried beans in the pantry already which are certainly good enough for my heart (and fart) when I need a quick bean fix.
As well, I just can’t get into sweet side dish offerings. Often, they’re “southern” inspired or traditional dishes that just leave my savory taste buds whining. I pretty much categorically hate yams, sweet potatoes, sweet bean anything, sweetened tea (come on now, give me a break), and anything sweet on pork . God, strike me down if I’m forced to eat applesauce with meat.
But anyhow, these were on sale for only 37 cents so I decided against my better judgement to pick up a can.
The first thing I noticed, that didn’t surprise me too much, was there was no “pork” to speak of in these beans. Oh sure, it’s listed there on the ingredients label. But what surprised me is that it is listed under the “less than 2% of” heading. That would explain the lack of pork in these beans. Maybe it’s just me, but this seems like false advertising taken to an extreme level. I mean, they should force VanCamp to call it “Beans and Pork”, or “Beans in Tomato Sauce With a Smidgen of Pork Flavoring”, or “Pork and Beans, PSYCHE! NO PORK, HAHA” or “Beans That You Should Eat WITH A Side of Pork Because There’s Really No Pork In Here”.
And so on.
The beans themselves are pretty average. They’re the small white bean variety and are soaked in tomato sauce or puree. I could’ve used a little more spice, anything to kill the sweet-madness. I tried dumping in a load of hot sauce into it, and the flavor improved about 300%. I still could only choke down a few spoons of the beans.
Sorry, I have a frequent repetitive-motion shoulder and back issue that has ramped up this past week. So it’s making me especially grumbly about not seeing a single shred of pork inside these beans which taste like they’ve been soaked in a gallon of sugar water. Ugh, my sweet tooth hurts. In fact, I’m going to stop talking about them because it’s not worth my typing. I’ve got a timer by the computer that’s set so I don’t spend longer than 15 minutes typing since it affects the shoulder. Ding, time’s up. Plus, if you like these crappy beans, there’s probably nothing I can say to change your mind otherwise.
These beans were pretty bad. But your hyperactive, sugar-freebasing kids may love them. However, you may want to keep the beans away from the young’uns lest they decide, in a sugar-induced fit of fantasy, to take the family van out for a cruise.
Price: $0.37 for 15 oz.
Found At: Fresh & Easy
Cheap Eats Score: 2/10
April 7th, 2009 at 8:24 pm
Pork and Beans, although cheap, always leads to food waste at my house.
I mean they taste “okay” but really they are only like-able when you’re starving at a backyard barbecue.
April 7th, 2009 at 9:26 pm
Haha! I keeled over laughing when I saw the title. I’m from Texas, and these things are a frickin STAPLE. I grew up on them! I haven’t had them in years though…I wonder if the recipe changed, because I always remember there being little slivers of pork in them.
Considering how different my diet is now, I’d probably find them horrendous.
April 8th, 2009 at 12:45 pm
We eat these on a regular basis. A plate of brisket, beans and a nice tall glass of sweet tea! Mmmm..mmm! LOL Yes, we are from Texas too!
I just add some BBQ sauce to the pan and man are they good.
As for the pork, there is usually a chunk of salt pork in the can. It’s never had shredded pork in there. Haha.
Yall crack me up!
April 13th, 2009 at 6:48 pm
They are great if you doctor them up…some ground beef and minced onion or sliced hot dogs. They used to be a favorite college meal over steamed rice.
July 2nd, 2009 at 7:06 pm
Sorry- i meant minute, not second
August 28th, 2009 at 4:47 pm
Pork and beans were a depression era staple. Huge can of beans with chunks of mostly pork fat in them to keep the good folks of the depression chugging along despite being unemployed and near penniless.
Over time due to peoples tastes they took out the giant slabs of pork fat. I remember in the 80’s eating them and there were little white bits of pork fat in it. Now there appears to be almost none.
I think they could make some headway with the whole pork and beans concept if they put some actual pork meat in the can.