1/12/10 | Poll: Happy Wins Food Poll
[ Currently Eating: Burnt Toast ]
Another year, another poll. Ever eat food dropped on ground? Please answer at top. See you later.
What. You were expecting a long and drawn out discussion of the winner of our previous poll: “Food Makes Me Feel…”?
[Editor's Note: Today's post and discussion analysis will be brought to you entirely inside of this editor's note. Why do people attach these stupid, italicized things to posts anyhow (he asked himself rhetorically)? Well, I know why I do. Since my memory is slowly fading away like so many 37 year old twinkies, I often forget to talk about important things in the main body of the post. And it takes too much of that fading brain power to rewrite the post to include that all-important tidbit. So I just tack it on at the end.
Plus, writing an editor's note makes me feel like this is one of those food blogs worth a million dollars that Boogle will eventually get around to buying. And when that happens, I really CAN retire on that island where Lost was shot. And so on.
Anyhow, we had 284 respondents to the "Food Makes Me Feel..." poll. One hundred twenty eight of those were probably duplicate responses made by Smart, Smart, Smart folks who get around the IP check by visiting all the libraries in their area and stuffing the ballot box.
I actually had a fourth answer in the poll originally, but for the life of me, I can't remember what it was! Another twinkie bites the dust. Well, the reason I don't remember it is probably because no one picked it, so I ended up deleting it after awhile. I think it was one of those "Too Smart For My Own Good" answers - maybe it was the word "logy".
Damn, the Simpsons were good for something after all.
The remaining answers were "Happy", "Fat" and "Dangerous". It's no surprise that "Happy" won with over 70% of the responses, since the type of people who read this blog definitely fall in the glass half full category. I mean Jeebus Weinerchrist, there's no way you could possibly get through this type of elliptical, incoherent rambling unless food really made you happy enough that you didn't blow a mind gasket. Or want to come after me with a 2 by 4.
By the way, in case you did not know: Happiness is a Warm Flan. You heard it here first.
The second answer, "Fat", was meant to prey upon everyone's new year resolutions that are never, ever kept. And indeed, twenty one percent of folks picked this answer. Indeed. I am thinking right now, that rather than get myself into serious trouble by trying to make any weight jokes, I should just shut up about this answer.
The third answer, "Dangerous", was inspired by those Dos Equines commercials. Excuse me, I didn't mean two horses. But yeah, I was thinking about that most interesting, dangerous godfather in the world who has awkward moments just to feel what it was like. Thinking about this answer made me wonder: are there actually clandestine Food Agents roaming the world, posing as mild-mannered advertising consultants, and attempting to infiltrate major corporations to obtain the secret formulas to their products?
(Tfeuhg8kuwhgjw wkg pugh1h Coke's Secret Ingredient is Happiness te398f lrtjgewb o8h)
No, I wouldn't know anything about that.]