There’s about a billion ways to make Pasta with Ham. Ham is a really resiliant form of Cheap Eats because it lasts so long in the fridge. This goes for both packaged ham steaks and for larger whole hams. My absolute favorite thing to do is to make this near the holidays, like Thanksgiving, Christmas, or Easter. Why? Because someone ALWAYS makes a whole ham and I’ve never been to a family gathering that didn’t have leftovers from it. Usually, the relatives have to cajole someone to take home some of the ham. I’m the first to signup, however. Leftover ham also makes great fried rice, sandwiches, etc. The below recipe assumes storebought ham, but subtract 75 cents from the final price if you can get it for free!

Pasta with Ham and Parmesan

Cubed Ham (1/4 of $3.00 hamsteak) — $0.75
Any Dry Pasta like Rotini (4 oz of $0.99 8 oz bag) — $0.50
Parmesan cheese (1/4 oz of $3.50 8oz can) — $0.11
Olive oil (1 tbsp of $4.00 12 fl. oz bottle) — $0.17
Butter (1 tbsp of $1.00 4 oz stick) — $0.13
Milk (1/2 cup from $4.19 1/2 gallon lactaid) — $0.26
Chicken Stock (1/2 a $.50 can) — $0.25
Brown Onion (1/8 a $.50 onion) — $0.06
Parsley (1/4 cup chopped from $0.69 bunch) — $0.06
Salt / pepper — negligible

Total: $2.29

Get a large pot of water going on the stove. Meanwhile, mince the brown onion and parsely and cube the ham. In a large skillet heat olive oil and add ham. Cook for 2-3 minutes or until browned, then add brown onion. Cook for another 2 minutes. Turn up heat to high and deglaze the pan with chicken stock and milk. Reduce heat and simmer mixture for 5-10 minutes. Watch out for the mixture foaming up too muich. If that happens, reduce the heat. When water boils, salt it and add macaroni. Cook till al dente then drain (don’t rinse or sauce won’t stick to pasta). Add pasta to skillet and toss well. Add parsley and parm cheese and cook for about 1 minute more. Off heat add butter, salt and pepper to taste. Mix and serve.

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I hesitate to call this a true Oyster Poorboy because the oysters aren’t deep fried or rolled in cornmeal or any of that other stuff. Plus I make it using oysters from a can. It’s more like an oyster sandwich. I find that it tastes really good though, and I can do with the flour-only coating. Depending on where you live, you are probably able to get oysters that are better tasting, fresher, and cheaper, but for me the can is the only easy way to go. I think they may come in jar too. By the way, oysters are a pretty much self-sustainable, non-polluting form of aqua-culture. I believe it’s one of the few like that. So you can eat your oyster sandwich and feel good about the environment… well, maybe.

Homemade Oyster Poorboy

Can of Oysters (1 small can) — $2.50
French Bread (1 small loaf) — $0.25
Mayo (1-2 tbsp of $2.00 jar) — $0.08
Parsley (1/4 cup chopped from $0.69 bunch) — $0.06
Flour (1/4 cup from $1.50 bag) — $0.03
Corn Oil (2 tbsp from $2.00 bottle) — $0.05
Salt / pepper — negligible

Total: $2.97

Chop parsley fine. Mix in small bowl with mayonnaise, add a bit of salt if you like. Drain the oysters from the can (save the oyster liqueur if you want). In a ziploc bag put in the flour, salt, pepper. Dump the oysters in there, seal and shake a bit. Heat oil in a nonstick pan. In meantime, put cut a pocket in the french bread and toast it if you like. When oil is hot, fry oysters until golden brown. Dry them on paper towel lined plate. Spread some mayo mixture on bread and shove as many oysters as you can in there. Sandwich is done.

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I make this quite a bit, but don’t have a picture handy just right now to show. This is not only fast because it uses the microwave, but tastes halfway decent. You can, of course, simply buy a box of Kraft Macaroni and Cheese or any number of other substitutes for around $1.50 to $2.50. I think that as far as Cheap Eats goes, this might beat them out if only slightly. It probably doesn’t beat out instant ramen recipes in price, but you can’t possibly eat that every day.

Macaroni Noodles w/ Parmesean Cheese

Macaroni (4 oz of $0.99 8 oz bag) — $0.50
Parmesan cheese (1/2 oz of $3.50 8oz can) — $0.22
Olive oil (1 tbsp of $4.00 12 fl. oz bottle) — $0.17
Butter (1 tbsp of $1.00 4 oz stick) — $0.13
Salt / pepper — negligible

Total: $1.02

Boil some water in a pot. Chuck in the macaroni with some salt and cook it until done. Drain it. Put it in a big microwave safe bowl, pour the olive oil and parmesan cheese over it and mix well. Throw in some black pepper. Put in the pat of butter and mix. Nuke the whole thing, but not too long. Maybe a minute, unless you’re starting with cold noodles. Mix again. Eat.

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